Trigger itch
by Jadeah
Summary: What happens when you've got Desmond's ancestors, their best friends, and Shaun playing their own game?  T for strong language.


"Can't you do _anything _right?" Shaun snapped in irritation.

Desmond sat on the couch nearby, watching as a clumsy assassin ran on the television screen beyond his control. He merely grunted in agreement.

Holding the Xbox controller was no other than Ezio, glaring visiously at the screen as he actidently pressed the attack button again and stabbed a random man walking the streets.

"Now why the bloody hell did you do that?" Shaun growled.

"How do I climb!" Ezio hissed back his question with venom lining his voice.

"Right trigger and A!" Shaun answered with aggrivation.

"Where's the trigger button?"

"Right where your index finger is you twit!"

Next to Desmond was Altiar, who had clearly fallen sleep out of the broedom of watching his descendent fail for the 30th time. Leonardo and Malik had left to "get snacks", in other words, avoid Ezio's tyrade. The young assassin was now regreting not going with them.

"Che cazzo!" Ezio exclaimed. "I did stab him!"

"You were suppost to throw him in the scaffold, you dumbass!" Shaun yelled back.

Desmond looked at Altiar, who was still fast asleep dispite their shouts and cures. His ancestor seemed more peaceful then usual.

"Cazzo! I'm just going to go to Machievelli!" Ezio growled as he made himself clumsily walk in the game away form the borgia tower.

"Machievelli is the other way!" Shaun corrected.

"I hate this game! They've messed up Claudia on so many levels, and my mother doesn't look that sheepish!" He had himself mount a horse and run.

"Now what the hell are you doing?"

"And that cape looks fake! It doesn't sway or anything! It's just stiff as wood!"

Shaun took the controller and exited out of the memory, going into a new one. This time where he had to follow a woman and carry her flower box. He slammed the controller hard against the assassin's chest as he unceremoniously passed it back. "Just play the level."

Ezio rubbed the area where Shaun possibly bruised his ribs with his palm and started the mission. THis time, he bumped into five people and almost went in the other direction, but he finished. "Yes! Yes! I'm done! I'm done!" He gloated with a look of triumpth in his eyes. But unforchanatly he woke Altiar in the process.

Shaun started a new mission and was about to start on his own when Altiar took the controller, and before Shaun could even explain the mission he started playing. Quickly figuring out the attack button and murdering every last enemy in sight. Soon he actidently picked up a broom and couldn't figure out how to drop it, so continued to use it like a weapon.

Desmond watched iwth interest as he saw Ezio confront Cesare in the Spainish castle, and completely laughed as Altiar begun to brutalize the General with the broom he was hold. He could have sworn he heard an evil chuckle from the ancient assassin.

Leonardo and Malik had returned with a bowl of chips and Leonardo carrying a six pack of beer. Malik was first to ask, "What is Altiar doing to him?"

"Spring cleaning."

Desmond looked over his shoulder to see Rebecca standing in the doorway, a smug smile on her face as she watched Altiar swing the broom at Cesare and making a strange sword sound.

Finally Altiar finished Cesare by magically dropping the broom and stabbing him, the cutscene started and Ezio twitched an eye.

"You killed him... With a retardly simple item as a broom..." Shaun said half speechless.

"Novice, I could do better." Malik boasted.

When teh cut scene was over, Shaun clicked a new mission and slapped it to the one armed assassin. And watched as more swears and complains streamed from the end, Malik had to do the ran anextra fourty times, then gave up and glared at everyone. THe first person to laugh was Shaun, but he was quickly taugh not to laugh with a strong crotch kick. THe brit collapsed on the floor gripping himself in pain.

Rebecca laughed, "Congratulations, you just lost Shaun Jr."

Desmond crossed his legs and scooted away from Malik as the man stormed away.

Leonardo turned the Xbox off, "I think we've played enough games."


End file.
